7.09.2005

The eddy of engaging

Is Anonymous the only one who thinks I've been a bit whiny lately? (You have to read the comment on the last post, plus my reply.) My roommates probably agree with Anonymous. I wonder if Anonymous is a Scientologist...has that kind of pull up your socks psychiatry is bullshit kind of tone. Those in the know know full well I am full up to my eyeballs of personality flaws. Perhaps I should say thank you more often for putting up with me. I'm certain it's not because you don't get anything out of being my friend. That's kind of the nice thing about getting older...realizing what you have to offer. I know who I am, but I don't always know who I WILL be...and therein lies the questioning. Constant questioning. Which leads to knowledge, which is why I know so much. Which I do. Which is why everyone I know is always calling me to ask things instead of looking in the phone book or on the internet. Because I am a font of random information. With the occasional foray into actual insight.

Surprised an anonymous commenter could get under my skin. Perhaps because I am always worrying about whining too much.

Make no mistake, I am well aware the past few weeks have been dark, and perhaps people only want to read funny here? Hm. Too bad. I'm dying to know if Anonymous is someone I know. Probably not, not well, anyhow. Perhaps a fellow comic? Could be. I challenge Anonymous to come work for one day at the flower shop and then tell me I don't exercise.

I am at once chastened, angered and petulant. Obviously Anon has struck a chord. Perhaps have been feeling sorry for myself of late. Possibly thinking it might be nice to let myself wallow for once. As usually am impatient for myself to slough off any first world problems and stay sparkling. Perhaps Anonymous doesn't know how much energy is spent giving good outward face in this world? The need for a safe spot to whine and let the bile one normally chokes back to exit? It's like a cleanse for the soul. That's what the blog is. A cleanse. So that I might go about my daily interactions free of the nagging whines. This is a place for my asshole chorus to have a voice. Well, hell, let's face it. It's a place I can say whatever I like and you all be damned!

Anyway, a bad back's a bad back. And love is love. Etc.

x
r.

ps - Also, I'd like to add, that I just reread that last entry, and I don't think that one was that whiny. I'm dying to give Anonymous a good kick in the shins.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

(Throws rock at bee hive. Hits.)

Infidelia said...

Whatever does that mean? That you have released the anger of my bees? That one got in my bonnet? That one got in yours? Whatever it does mean, I like the way you say it.

r.

Anonymous said...

Infidelia, I appreciate your appreciation. I am glad I released the anger of your bees. I think you can cope with my comments (tame as they are, really) because if you couldn't, you'd be cracking the spine of a leather bound journal and warming up your Pilot Hi Tech Point to vent your inner turmoil. I think it's good for you that I am anonymous. Sometimes the truth hurts, and friends, whether you know them or not, want to tell it to you only to help you. If you knew the source you could simply deflect, project, blame, attack. Because you don't, you are forced to consider the possibility that I am right. Even just a little bit.

Infidelia said...

You think I can't deflect because I don't know you? Well, shows how much you know.

Bugger off!

Now that's a deflection...(waggles cigar).

miss sara said...

god. what a bizarre interaction...i hope that whoever wrote that reveals themselves. if it is a friend-then one would would hope that they could feel like they could talk to you in person. and since you requested they buzz off-i hope they respect your wishes. that is lame. hope this doesn't stop you from venting freely.

Anonymous said...

Okay, I need to intervene. I live in England, so trust me, no one knows me where you are. And you might ask why does some English dude (or dudette) need to anonymously respond to a blog of a nobody. But I do! That's just me, right? I would like to say that "Anonymous" the real anonymous, is the real friend of this infidelia, and that the "miss sara" is not. Yes, that's what I think. the Inf. Lady is a bore and a trial. But she is interesting and flawed and engaging. So. The other thing I would like to say, not that anyone is fucking asking, is that Mr or Mrs. Anonymous is the real star here. A good writer, well-directed. He or she MUST be a friend of Inf. And if not, I would like to marry her. Or him. Or errr. GARRRR. I hate blogs;