3.28.2005

New glasses, new world.

You'll notice that my entries are getting few and far between, and lacking in bulk, or girth, or something. I would apologize, but who the hell would I be apologizing to? Myself, I guess.

I got new glasses today. Very exciting. My prescription had changed quite a bit, so my vision has been compromised for a while. It's a pleasure to see everything so crisply. And to relax my face. I don't think I realized how much I was squinting. Of course, now I'm afraid I'll scratch them, which I inevitably will, I just hope it's not for a few months at least. They're super foxy, these specs, probably the sexiest glasses I've had. Hot.

I saw the most remarkable piece of theatre on Friday night. It's called "You Are Here", by Daniel McIvor. Anyone who knows the work of this stand out Canadian playwright knows that when you do a piece of his you are starting from an elevated point, so you'd really have to fuck it up to fuck it up. The production that's running at Performance Works on Granville Island is devastatingly beautiful. Colleen Wheeler is the lead and she is mind blowing. Anyway, it made my sob my little heart out, got into a very tender place about my dad. I had just been kind of ripened for a big sobfest anyway, due to the fact that when I was out for dinner with Warren the other night we heard Bruce Springsteen's "Born to Run" on the radio and that set me off. My dad loved the Boss, and I followed suit, with great sentimental attachment to the music. Guess I hadn't heard any since Phil died, so it was shocking to realize it could be so affecting. So I was just ready to burst at the play, and the dam just crumbled. Good cry, and very sympathetic strangers bringing me kleenex at intermission, saying that when they saw it the first time that's what happened to them, too. The first time. That should say something. That people are going back to see this show again and again. That never happens. Go see it.

It's confusing to be really happy and really sad at the same time. It's a full heart, that's for sure.

I just got a call to go down to Bellingham and play with Ryan Stiles. I am fucking giddy. Not just at his theatre, but WITH him. HA!!

It's been quite wonderful to go back to doing standup again. I've changed. I think it's because of two things: Performing so much as an improvisor in the last few months, and my dad dying. All of a sudden I have all the confidence in the world. I just want to be up there doing it, whether it goes well or not. I have total faith in my stage presence. My material has a lot of catching up to do, but I feel like that's a road I'm willing to travel. I have a lot of patience for the material. I was frustrated with my own fear holding me back, and I think that is seriously ebbing. I just don't feel afraid, I only feel like finally, finally my life is happening the way I want it. I have my moments where I wish it had come together like this while I was younger, but I suppose we are all ready for things when we are ready. And I'm ready.

Plus it's spring. So everyone's all flirty and smiley and it's awesome. I love love. I love this time of year. Sheesh. I'm giddy. Sob sob. See? It's confusing.

x
r.

Next post - show dates and times.

2 comments:

SD said...

Hey Spring Lambchop--I think the Boss was a message for you from Phil for sure. I've been getting endless repeats of every song and artist I ever mocked him for liking. And the funny thing is now I find every thing from Dexy's Midnight Runners to Steely Dan charming or heartbreakingly beautiful, where once I hurled. It's like Radio Free Phil all the time around here.

And the fearlessness too is a gift from him. In my case, when you've lost the most important thing in your life, there's nothing left to fear. Except for Joan Allen's neck chords, as I mentioned yesterday.

Thoughts for the day....see you tonight.

Anonymous said...

SD said...
Hey Spring Lambchop--I think the Boss was a message for you from Phil for sure. I've been getting endless repeats of every song and artist I ever mocked him for liking. And the funny thing is now I find every thing from Dexy's Midnight Runners to Steely Dan charming or heartbreakingly beautiful, where once I hurled. It's like Radio Free Phil all the time around here.

And the fearlessness too is a gift from him. In my case, when you've lost the most important thing in your life, there's nothing left to fear. Except for Joan Allen's neck chords, as I mentioned yesterday.

Thoughts for the day....see you tonight.

9:55 AM