Nerdsville

A friend wrote me today and asked "...how's tricks, kid?".

Tricks are thus: I love the new job. I love that the restaurant is temporarily falling apart without me (I imagine them to be back up to speed soon, or operating at a different speed), even though it would be more graceful not to love that. I love my apartment. I love the way I've been looking lately, (specifically my hair).

I was sick in bed Thursday and Friday and because of that put my back out Saturday, (while shaving my legs, by the way. I'm such a nerd). Body says stop, brain has a hard time listening. Body and brain need to get on the same team. I have some plans in the works to make that happen.

Romantic life is so...so much like it always has been. Nebulous and changeable, and better ignored. I have new crushes all the time and they only lead to eye rolling and irritation. Comedy suffers. I can't do everything...(or everyONE, for that matter). Comedy really suffers.

Comedy is suffering hard lately. I don't know why. I think because of this disconnect between my brain and my body. I gotta get back in my body and out of my brain.

I am vibrating with anxiety most of the time even though, structurally speaking, my life seems to be going well. Worried and tense. I wake up sharply sucking in air most mornings, like something has jolted me. It takes me a minute to remember what day it is, where I am, what my face is for...

I am trying to book some time with a therapist, and I've booked a spot for a workshop with an Irish healer. Three days in April in Victoria. A friend of mine has been taking the guy's workshops and says it's no bullshit, just hard work. I think the most gifted healers out there are the ones that give you the space and safety to do the work, that facilitate the healing, as opposed to saying they will heal you. It takes some humility to be a good healer.

I'm hungry.

I'm going for a walk.

I'm okay, by the way, even with the anxiety. I am living with it and devising ways around it, which is what I think you're supposed to do. It's okay, to have anxious phases, and I'm better off not beating myself up about it. Just get to the root, dig it out, deal with it. Ich, that's what got me kind of tizzyfied, I guess. Getting back on the dealing-with-it train. Here we go, more work!!

xo

Title me this, Bookman.

I figured something out. I know why I haven't been posting things much on the ol' bloggeroonie, (bloggerooney? blog-r-ooni?). It's because I'm greedy. I've been keeping all the good stuff for joke writing. I'm sorry to have to say it, but I redirected things...it's not you, it's me.

Or something.

But, yes, I figured it out when I thought of something funny I wanted to blog about, but then realized I wanted to save it for the stage, and I'm still going to. I'm pretty excited that I have some new things I want to try. It's been a rough couple of weeks with no shows. Makes me so testy. Looking forward to a few coming up. I hope I have the balls to do the new stuff I've been writing. It's not controversial, but it's personal. I'm pretty sure that's the best way to go, for a gal like me.

So. I guess what I'm trying to say is, you gotta come see me if you want the really good shit.

xoxo

Bisous

I never knew how elusive comedy really was until I had it for a minute and then it slipped through my fingers and I didn't have it any more. I was queen of the world for a minute. A minute. I want it back. Badly.

I love my new job, by the way. At Invoke Media. I am feeling incredible relief that I am using my brain again. It's up there, rattling around, might as well put it to use.

Me and David Bowie, we're gonna spend some quality time together now. I hear that, Bowie. I hear that.

xo
r.

Update

Here's a little peek at what's coming up. Come out and see me, I'm having so much fun! Writing lots and feeling kind of groovy, actually.



Upcoming Shows-

Wednesday, January 30th, LIME (formerly RIME), 9:30pm, 1130 Commercial Drive, $5. Always an excellent night of comedy!

Tuesday, February 5th, KINO CAFE, 9:30pm, Cambie Street between 18th and 19th Avenue, pass the hat.

COMPETITION ALERT #1
***Wednesday, February 6th, YUK YUK'S, 1015 Burrard Street, 8:30pm, $10.***

Sunday, February 10th, SOHO BAR & GRILL, 1184 Denman Street @ Davie upstairs, 9:00pm. NEW ROOM!!! Please come support it and keep it happening.

Saturday, February 23rd, THE WIRED BEAN, 200 West Esplanade, North Vancouver, 9pm, $5?

COMPETITION ALERT #2 (please note date change)
***Thursday, March 20th, CEILI'S IRISH PUB, 670 Smithe Street, 8pm.***

May or June - Breast Cancer Research Fundraiser - details to come. I'll be doing 20 minutes!

xo

Here's Something

I am having a weird time. Money so tight, makes me anxious. Though someone reminded me I have been in worse financial positions. I have to find a second job. Sigh. Or a different full time one. I am at an interesting and intense crossroads. I feel like now is the time I have to choose whether I want the big comedy life or the little island life, as it were, and if I want the little island life then I can casually and contentedly go about my business exactly as I am, but if I want the big comedy life, well....the hard work starts now. What I really want is a month alone in a cabin to get some writing done. I am petulant about my job interrupting my creative life. Blah blah. You don't need to say anything or anything, I'm working it out, but it's a really strange time. I've never felt so unsure and sure of myself at the same time. Trying to plan long term, feel a city move coming on. I think my mom is going to sell the apartment this year, so I have to stop feeling like I'll be in it the rest of my life and start packing again. Everything is different for 2008. Especially me. I won't get into the incredibly intense psychic phenomena I am experiencing, but sufficed to say that I feel like my brain is open to all the energy in the world, universe and it's a bombardment of stimuli. I feel like I can see right through people's skin and into their hearts, which is minorly disconcerting. I think I am figuring out how powerful I am and trying to figure out how to be in control of that power. Talking talking. Thinking thinking. I need silence.